Photos from Born in ‘88 ! 6/17/09

OMG I am so late. But here are some pics from my Birthday party back on June 17. A special day to me for several reasons. Thank you to everyone who came out…Shawn Lawrence James, my older sister India, Animal Behavior, Ray Kairos, Wave, Christine, 106th, Mimi, Shyvonne, DJ Will Gates, J. Cole. Ib, Elite, Omen, GWIZ, Roland, Danyel Smith, Elliott Wilson, John Kennedy, Goat, Donny Goines, Danni, Alex Gale, Laura Checkoway, D. Scott, Omar A., Anthony, Morales… okay, everyone. [** by Rahan Cotterel]

21, ya’ll**

The cake, it’s a stack of books.

AnimalBehavior y John Kennedy

Sorry, Mámá?

Me y J. Cole

Whose arm is this? I love you.**

It’s Mimi, Baby.**

AB

AB, Waverly, Me**

Omen and J. Cole performing “The Badness” DOPE**

Cole Killin’**

Mas.**

Dannii !**

Loyalty. Those are Let’sJustEatCheese stickers. Omar A. He’s been reading my work since Journalism class in high school.

Trying to hide from a camera, per usual.

106th WORKING.

Shyvonne was AMAZE.**

Never gave a fuck about no high end fashion.**

Have a Good Day

When I open my eyes
I see the world around me
like trees, flower, people. and me
If I believe in myself
I know just what to do and say
Life is good
to me and you

poem by Kyla Barbosa
**Kyla is my 8 year old sister. She is, pretty much, just like me.

Other Stories

Champagne glasses shattered across the floor.

Valet sensed the urgency.

Began to think about the ocean. You on the beach. The sounds, the waves, the cries of joy. Your forearm. Strength. Grip.

Where’s the car?

Are you happy now? You asked. You’ve used what you think love is. And you turned it into a self-portrait. Are you happy? All the success. You. Your words. You and your words. Before you go, tell me. Are you happy?

I take in the ocean when I can. Aren’t people always searching for more?

You can read Other Stories here.

***

It’s usually the Brooklyn basements or Recita rooftops that make me realize I hate this earth. It’s waking up at 6am, while you lay sleeping, wondering how, physically, my body managed to make it to you, to here. And it all comes together, at different times, in pieces, like a foreign family to the free land. The earth is giving up on me. There is no feeling of joy, no height of climax, no – connecting. But there is you. There is this earth. This basement. That rooftop. Your words. Your time. The earth is going to have my soul. I cannot move. My hands. They’re moving. I am touching everything.

You want to know. More and more. You know so much, know so little. There are questions. There are your eyes. I am sitting, watching your eyes and your hands. And I’m starting to think about writing. There is no feeling but there are words. The words of sleepless nights, the stolen, the deceit, the bags, love, hate, lies, drugs, alcohol, parents, moms, dads, sisters, brothers, enemies, envy, hair, cheese, there is wine. You begin to drink. There are questions. You ask. Where is the happiness? What about the sex, the love, the passion, hugs, rain in the height of summer, the sun, smiles, sons, daughters, children. I am in a basement. And it’s usually the basements or rooftops that make realize there is – this earth.

You can read Allure here.

Rest

after anything

via sartorialist

“if i write about my ‘feelings’ for him, do u think they will die?” editor: “nah”

I cannot wait to see you
keep thinking about what you’ll say
what I’ll say
been hoping you’d stop dancing
around
what we could be
yes
to what you want
I picture us
us here
us there
lighting
blowing
your candle
my flame
and suddenly I am scared
of what we may not be
you’re like success
like happiness
to me
Here
Gone
Here and
Gone
but stay
or kill me dead
my flame
like before prom
before wedding
unease
I’ll close you like a book
if you’re feet continue to dance
around this beat
unparallel and hot
praying this goes away
sign sending to the universe
in secret
wanting you to stay.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 17TH

SLJ says No Robocops. But ya’ll fine by me.

AnimalBehavior will slay you, so please be appropriate.

Chloe’s coming from Cali.

106th is wearing a leopard print onesie. And singing Happy Birthday.

The LJEC community will make sure you’re good.

YOU better be there.

SO NECESSARY

Download here.

Previous: The Follow Up: J. Cole

I Really Mean It

Allure; distilled vodka

He was perfect. She talked about how it felt when she touched him; he felt like a man. She hadn’t thought of him until he sent her a message. Then it all came back. The four different cars. The woman he embraced atop a bed of leaves. The lies. The leaving. Her words.

They spent four hours sitting in a car talking about the intimate moments they shared – the public and the private. And when they kissed, she realized the walls he couldn’t get past and the walls he could tear down. Screen captures of his face, on top of her, giving a different kind of love.

With her head in his lap she thought about what it would be like for him to be the one she did love. The one she wanted to love. Ready to love the one who didn’t know she loved him. She thought about what he would say. What they’d talk about. How his waist would feel in her grip. But she’d wait for that.

In the car she asked him why he sent the message. His indistinct answer was something along the lines of missing her, tired of going off memory. Despite her sudden departure, he was glad he could inspire some of her work. She looked out the window of the car that sat idle on a dead end street. Thought about how she prayed for men and played with boys. Looked to him and said Thank you.

strawberries and cream.

I’m already / Forgetting your face / So maybe I was playing/ Myself more than I thought / About having more feelings than / Most assholes.

Morality

“The one thing I remember saying,” she told Chad, “and probably only because he mentioned it today, was that we weren’t living in abject poverty or even discomfort. It was the fear of those things that got us down.” -from Stephen King’s short story, Morality via Esquire