For Misfits Only: Lights Please

Back in 2006, I’d heard his music, but I didn’t hear him. Back in 2007, he attended a party I hosted, still hadn’t heard him. But back in July, I heard him for the first time, with eager ears – secretly I’d been listening to J. Cole’s horn blaring “I Get Up” at my corporate gig. Days before his performance I anticipated a large stage, flashing lights, barriers – on the day of the event there was a couch, dark lights, and a familiar, boyish, charming rapper.

I watched 23-year-old Jermaine Cole walk into the Soho Grand Hotel in New York City with the same anticipation I had earlier that night, hoping he’d perform “I Get Up.” He looks excited, in striped Polo, Mac Book Pro in hand. You can’t tell from his smile that this son of a white actress from North Carolina can vividly paint a picture for you about the wonders of both worlds – black and white. There’s no doubt in his tone that he is going to be the best. He knew it at 12, and stands by it now. Fayetteville holds his fondest memories – basketball dreams, Friday night ciphers at football games. We talk about inspiration, that moment that comes by and you can’t shake. “It’s a feeling that comes over me, I start pulling from experiences because I know I’ll never get it back.”

There’s some talk of J. Cole’s music on the Internet. But he knows this is the beginning. Not trendy, stylish, certainly not hipster rap, more “I want to make it cool to have morals. Not be a saint, because I’m not. But I like to explore what it’s like to be a man.”

Just months after his debut mixtape, The Come Up hit the net, he’s already over it. That material was recorded years ago. Far more quality music, growth, and life experiences have taught him patience and diligence since his college days at St. John’s University. Weeks ago on set at a photo shoot, his manager mentions a possible performance out of state: “We’re just working on the money.” “I don’t need any money,” the artist responds. He creates music as producer first – then writes. Consider this brief introduction – “Hi, my name’s J. Cole, nice to meet you.” – in a sweet and raw Southern accent.

On The Come Up.

The Come Up actually dropped a year ago and no one knew. Passing out CDs at North Carolina’s A&T’s Homecoming for $1. Because if someone gives you a CD for free, you’re going to throw that shit out. But if you paid at least a dollar for it you’re going to give it a listen. We finally released it online and got a crazy response. On numerous occasions, someone will be talking to me and say, “Yo, you ever heard of this rapper, J. Cole?” That was so crazy to me.

First time.

I started rapping at age 12. I wrote my first rap when Tupac died. It went something like, “You had love in the east, but you didn’t know it.” It was corny.

Talk on the Internet.

There are two things that are important to me. An industry buzz, the shit you don’t see. Not the blog shit, the executive shit. Going in and sitting with executives and A&R’s. It’s one thing to have a street buzz, I mean, Papoose had a street buzz – it’s another to have people in the game asking about you.

Life after college.

Rapping is it. I want to be the best. College was my ticket to New York and a big ass distraction. I didn’t forget about rap, I just put it on the back burner. It was beautiful because college provided me with experiences that molded me as a person. Now I’m back to where I started and literally on the road to be the greatest.

Biggest challenges with rap.

My favorite rappers rap about shit that I could never rap about. It’s all art and entertainment at the end of the day and you choose your persona but there is something in me that won’t let me choose something that doesn’t socially reflect who I am. Tupac, Nas, and Jay-Z, rap about a lot of street shit that I know about from my experiences. I’m challenged to find the most creative ways to still reel people in with different stories that they can relate to. It’s also an opportunity because it’s a lane that has never been done. Every now and then I do want to kill someone on my song, for fun. Just to see what it will be like. Sometimes you want to play different roles because you know you can.

Best advice.

The higher your goals are, and the bigger you dream, the smaller your competition becomes. I know what I’m aiming for. I want to be remembered as one of the best to do it. I want it to happen naturally, I almost don’t like saying it. When you strive to make timeless classics, your competition becomes so little, because these dudes that are doing it on blogs – their goal is to get hot and land a deal and put out a hot single. You get what you ask for. But what happens after that? You’re like, “Oh shit, I should have asked for something else.” You already got to the top of what you wanted. I’m going to be more patient because my competition is greater. I’m not even concerned about the rappers on blogs.

On beauty.

You know how many arguments I got into about this (goatee)? “Yo son I’m telling you, they’re going to cut it off.” Where I’m from this is what we have. It’s a personal attachment. If you’re telling me that cutting this off is going to get me a deal, I don’t want your deal.

Floor or counter?

Floor is always fun. Like if you’re in college and you have roommates, but you don’t want the bed to squeak. So you move to the far end of the room, kind of out of their sight.

First concert.

My mom took me to see classic shit like James Taylor; at the time of course I didn’t appreciate it. Now I realize he’s a genius. She also took me to a Peter, Paul and Mary show; they’re a folk group (starts singing “Puff, The Magic Dragon”). The first rap show I went to was Ruff Ryders and Cash Money. I was such a DMX fanatic, just standing in the crown with my X in the air. X, Babbbby.

What kept you in college?

My mom never got a chance to go to college. The opportunity wasn’t there. When I was younger, it was always school is the most important shit. And although the work came easy, I always knew school wasn’t my passion. I came up here thinking I’d get signed and never have to finish. It didn’t happen like that.

Miss most about college.

Man, no responsibilities. When you graduate, and that second month’s rent is due, it hits you. When you’re in school, you’re just a broke college student. It’s acceptable. But when you’re out of school and you’re broke, you’re just a broke-ass nigga. It’s real life broke. There are no more excuses. It’s almost cool to say, “Damn, man, I’m broke,” when you’re a student. But when you’re not, it’s like, “You’re a grown-ass man get a job.” I miss the lack of responsibility and freedom.

Last book you read.

Celestine Prophecy. I believe in spirituality. Also, The Color of Water, it’s about a black kid being raised by a white mother. Being embarrassed that you have a white mother but she really doesn’t care. She doesn’t give a fuck, ’cause that’s your mom. But in your world it’s so important to you. Like does she know she’s white? We use to go to a Baptist church and she was the only white person in there. She didn’t feel uncomfortable at all.

Black and white – then and now.

It was weird. You know you love your mom with all your heart. But you’re growing up in a society where your friends will clown you about anything. So then you do things you regret years later like deny your mom. Maybe shy away from bringing her to certain events because you think people may make fun of you. It’s an amazing experience because I get to see both sides of everything, from my white side of the family to the black side. I have it all. Suburb whites, suburb blacks, poor white and blacks. I can speak everyone’s language. Now it’s something I’m proud of. It’s an advantage. I’ll flaunt it before I shy away from it.

One thing your mother was right about.

She always told me I was going to be an actor. She’s an actress and always starred in local plays and productions. Winning local awards, I thought “Good job, mom.” When I look back at all the things she was doing, she is incredible. She can get into character so quick. She always tells me I have it in my genes. Rapping is like an actor on stage, you get into character and just perform.

Most embarrassing moment.

I was like 16 or 17 at a teen club, participating in a rap battle. I knew what I had and in my mind I knew I was so much better than the guys that were battling. All my friends are there – they know my talent, my ability, and me. Everyone’s young around this time, so the audience is easily impressed. I spit my verse first, it’s hot and the crowd is going crazy. The next dude, he gets up there, his verse is pretty lame and boring. The crowd is not impressed at all. His last line was this, “You ain’t So So Def, your teeth just got jagged edges.” Crowd goes insane! When he said it, I put my hand over my face, and the crowd got even more excited. After years of analyzing, I realized I beat myself. Everyone could feed off my energy and see that it hit me personally. It taught me people react off how you react. If they don’t see anything faze you, they wont know. Man, that was embarrassing as hell.

Performing artist.

I use to think I was automatically good at performing because I can rap. Once I learned to connect with the crowd and not be all over the place – avoiding that natural tendency to want to please the entire crowd. You want everyone to get a little bit of your energy but you can’t do that because if you see one person who doesn’t look into it, that’ll fuck with your mind. One thing I learned to do is to just perform without seeing them. And they’re going to naturally be drawn to you.

On “I Get Up.”

I was going through the Hypnotic Brass Ensemble’s CD and I hear the song. I couldn’t believe it. So I make the beat and it’s so sick. I know I want to do something to it. Instantly I hear the words “I Get Up” in my head, just humming the hook. Sometimes my own beats intimidate me, I sat on it for weeks. I wrote the line “Paint a picture to show the deaf what it’s like to listen. Speak the words tell a blind man what he’s missing.” What if you could really do that? That would be some wild shit. You have to find the perfect picture and words. That shit is amazing. Really, I just wanted to make some uplifting shit. Something with positive messages but still keep it my normal self – struggling between ignorance and enlightenment.

All photos by Rahan Cotterel

Listen to some tracks here. Also at Myspace.com/therapistmusic

I Get Up

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